Harder Than I Thought

If you had asked me a year ago if losing weight or maintaining weight loss was harder, I would have rolled my eyes and answered "losing weight by a long shot". Now, I think my answer would be different. I was convinced that once I had lost my weight that maintaining that weight loss would be a walk in the park. Wow, was I sorely mistaken there! I had restricted my diet for so long that I wanted to allow myself to eat the things that I enjoy in moderation. The problem is, when you are someone like me who struggles with food on an emotional level...that moderation thing is tricky! I wish that it hadn't taken me gaining back 20 lbs to realize just how out of hand my eating habits have gotten again, but unfortunately the case. I have wanted to write this blogpost for a while, but I was afraid that I would be faced with so much judgement for putting weight back on. I realize that most of that judgement comes from myself, but people are critical when people put weight BACK on. Don't think that's true? Tell me that you haven't looked at a picture of Jonah Hill lately and said, "how did he let himself get that big again." Oprah is continually mocked for her "yo-yo weight". Well, judge away if you want but it's more difficult than you think I assure you.

I had done fairly well with continuing to exercise at least once or twice a week. Then, I met Cierra. Cierra is a girl that I worked with briefly, and although we only worked together for a short time we became friends. Cierra and I are fairly evenly matched on a fitness level so we became workout partners. We started working out together several times a week, and I had accountability again. Kind of. I had accountability again, but only in the gym. We were doing lots of cardio but my body was staying the same. I was no longer gaining weight, but I certainly wasn't losing either. A couple of months ago I suggested a new workout plan for us. We both wanted a personal trainer but did not want to pay the money for one. I suggested that we start taking turns planning our workouts with the intention of challenging the other as much as possible. We decided to add weight training into our workouts as well. We each strive every week to plan a workout that pushes the other to the brink and it has worked wonderfully for us. We no longer waste a single workout. We go in with a plan and we give it our all until we can't go anymore. You put a lot more effort into a workout when you are planning it for someone other than yourself. We have been using this system for about two months and I am starting to see results in my body. I am stronger, and my endurance is much higher, but my weight is not changing. Want to know why? Because I haven't been putting the effort into my eating. Well, that is changing. For the last week, I have been making a conscious effort to be careful of the fuel that I put into my body. I am going to get this weight back off and I will keep it off this time. I'm sure that you have your doubts, why wouldn't you? I am more determined than ever and I am excited for you to watch my progress in the coming months! The blog is back! I have missed this outlet as a means of staying on track. Here we go...